A dark cloud has appeared in the heavens above California today. My back-up boyfriend, aka Ryan Reynolds, has announced his engagement to that blonde chick with the big hoo-hoos from “Ghost World”. Apparently, he got tired of waiting for me all these years and decided to just pull the trigger. Or maybe he’s just trying to get some hand in our relationship. Ok. So it’s imaginary hand in our imaginary relationship, but still….
If he goes through with this sham of a marriage, I will have to officially dump his ass and find a new make-believe boyfriend. Damn. All the good ones are taken, gay, or douchy. It’s so difficult being me sometimes.